Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Jessie's Story, Part 1

Jessie was a mixed up girl in a mixed up world...Free and wild, marching to the beat of her own drum...She met a man, fell in love. Things went wrong and now both her baby and her first true love reside in Heaven...She met another man, felt herself falling...but alas, he belonged to another and she walked away from that situation. Married a stable, hardworking man because that is what she was told she must do...Wasn't in her heart to do, but out of a necessity, she made the leap.
The romance was never there. The kissing stopped within months...and then it was just the sex...and his drinking.
Jessie, without realizing it, simply stopped caring. She couldn't escape...too many lives would be affected. She let her looks, her body and her health go because she couldn't pull a trigger.
Now she's torn...hating her body, her health and her looks, but knowing if they improve, then the frequency of sex will return...and sex in a marriage without romance and kissing is akin to prostitution...and Jessie is just too damned old and tired for that.
Somedays she doesn't think about it...and sometimes she's lucky when those days turn into months...But ever so often, she'll wake up with an intense clarity within her mind and the burdens weigh on her like a ton of bricks...And she wonders, will she ever be kissed again???