Thursday, January 17, 2008

Ramblings from a depressed mind

I'm not sure what to make of this life I live. I'm not sure what is expected of me, wanted from me or required of me. All I know is that people are cruel and fickle, spiteful and deceptive; back biters and back stabbers. And the majority of these monsters are in churches!
It makes me SICK!
How can a person claim to love God, yet hate his/her brother/sister?
How can a pastor claim to be a pastor if he refuses or neglects to discipline his flock?
A person can be on fire for God, move into a church, work their butts off and then when the person is worn out, sucked dry of all energies, these so-called saints can't wait to turn their backs on the person.
Sort of like they take you in, chew you up and then spit you out without a thought or consideration.
It hurts.
It hurts to see people playing church, week after week, while they live their lives as demons from the very pits of hell.
Little wonder that the Christian movement has so many opponents and is the brunt of many a joke, many a raised eyebrow and many a sneer.
The peculiar thing is that these people live the life of athiest...They may claim to be sincere Christians, but they live their lives as if there is no God, or at least as if they really don't believe there is one!
There is a fine line between loving the sinner where he is at and being a sinner who refuses to admit it.

As I ventured into 2008 I found myself stopping and taking stock of where I am with Christ, and it isn't a good place to be...I'm here and He is not close.

The church body and the Temple of God should be an orderly place where peace reigns and joy springs forth. It should be a place that is reverent to the Almighty, humbled in His presence and a place where Grace abounds.
I want this for my life. I need this in my heart.
I pray for His forgiveness for living a carnal life.
My sin is before me and only His Blood can cleanse and make me whole.

January 17th, 2008